Wednesday's Words to Live By For Jan 4th to Jan 10th Forgiving & Forgetting Part II

[Rev. Dr. Dorothy E. Hooks, PsyD]

1. Negative consequences of the absence of forgiving and forgetting:

 A.  The partners in a relationship where one or both of them have not forgiven or forgot, will run the risk of:

               *Continuously being hurt with pain and suffering going unresolved.

               *Chronically seeking revenge and paybacks from one another.

               *Being caught up in unresolved anger, animosity, and bitterness.

               *Being lost in a festering wound that never realizes the revitalization of healing.

               *Fear over making a mistake or of having the mistake revealed.

               *Being overwhelmed by fear of failure, fear of rejection, fear of love, fear of

                 non-approval, low self-esteem, and fear of conflict.

B.   Signs of the lack of forgiving and forgetting:

              *Irreconcilable differences between people.

              *Indifference toward one another.

              *Chronic attacks or angry outbursts.

              *Addressing or interacting with one another disrespectfully.

              *Chronic depression.

              *Seeking revenge from one another.

              *Chronic recalling and reminding of past hurts and offenses.

              *Suspicious about the others’ motives, behavior, attitudes, and beliefs.

              *Name calling, belittling and demeaning one another.

              *Responding to present behavior as if it were past behavior.

              *Unwillingness to change and/or unwillingness to seek the help necessary to change.

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Shalom,

Dr. Hooks